It's quite interesting to see how our topics of conversation has changed throughout the years. Remember the moments when you talked about your crush to your girl friends? Or perhaps talked about whether you think the guy that you like also likes you in the same manner? hahaha. Now our conversation has changed to how to save for future house, how to know if he's Mr Right or not, what kind of values you want to impart to your kids, and so on and so forth.
Recently my 'normal' catchup with my friends stumbled upon the topic of abortion. I don't know how my friend suddenly shared how she knew a couple who told her that they actually had a third child, but they aborted the baby because the baby was diagnosed with Down Syndrome. She said that the couple thought it would be better for the baby not to be born, rather than having born with Down Syndrome. I was a bit shocked at the beginning, but I tried to stay calm and reminded myself how normal it is to think like that now (even though we claimed to be Christians or Catholics).
I looked at my friend and asked, "Do you really think it's okay?" And she looked reluctant for awhile.
I remember my other friend turned to me and said, "What would you do in such situation?"
So here's my answer. I'm writing this down here and now because when difficult times happen, there will be many people who influence me not to do what is right. Not because they are 'evil', but because the society now really thinks of what is useful, what is not burdensome.
I said it will be tough to make the decision to defend the baby's life.
It's not easy to raise children with certain illness or psychological conditions.
However, I've met and witnessed more and more courageous parents who decided to bring up these children, who are not influenced by society that tried to dictate us to choose what is the most convenient choice for us. Next time when I say my marriage vow, "...in good times and in bad...", it is a vow to enter a marriage that is not portrayed by most of the Hollywood movies.
I have seen a mother with her teenager who has Down Syndrome. This girl made the most beautiful genuflection in front of Our Lord (I would say better than many adults). Her parents believed that their children, both the typically developing and the one with developmental delays, could grow in virtues too.
When I was waiting for my friends outside a shop in Rome, I managed to have a short conversation with a Japanese lady and her teenager-daughter who has a Down Syndrome. I was a bit 'tempted' to talk in motherese (there's a tendency to treat them as children). However, I was reminded that even if their mental age is lower than their chronological age, at that stage, she was not supposed to be treated like a child. So I asked a few questions just like how I normally talk to the teenagers. I observed how the mother talked to her in Japanese, and I was just amazed on how refine this young lady was!
I also witnessed a young couple defending the life of their first-born baby who 'just' lived for three months. I don't think I can forget how courageous they are and how supportive their friends are from Legion of Mary. For some people, perhaps this is a 'waste-money-decision'. However, for a lot of us, this young couple has become a real example how it is very possible to be heroic to say no even though other people may say "it's better to abort the baby".
To be honest, I felt sad. And a bit scared... I've seen more and more friends are confused despite the fact that we go to Church every Sunday (again...it's not sufficient to just go to Church).
So I pray that I can journey more with my friends. I pray that we can talk more about these issues about life, because life is not a small matter. I pray that we can be strong support for each other if any of us needs to make difficult, but a right decision, just like how I've seen some other mothers supported each other.
Recently my 'normal' catchup with my friends stumbled upon the topic of abortion. I don't know how my friend suddenly shared how she knew a couple who told her that they actually had a third child, but they aborted the baby because the baby was diagnosed with Down Syndrome. She said that the couple thought it would be better for the baby not to be born, rather than having born with Down Syndrome. I was a bit shocked at the beginning, but I tried to stay calm and reminded myself how normal it is to think like that now (even though we claimed to be Christians or Catholics).
I looked at my friend and asked, "Do you really think it's okay?" And she looked reluctant for awhile.
I remember my other friend turned to me and said, "What would you do in such situation?"
So here's my answer. I'm writing this down here and now because when difficult times happen, there will be many people who influence me not to do what is right. Not because they are 'evil', but because the society now really thinks of what is useful, what is not burdensome.
I said it will be tough to make the decision to defend the baby's life.
It's not easy to raise children with certain illness or psychological conditions.
However, I've met and witnessed more and more courageous parents who decided to bring up these children, who are not influenced by society that tried to dictate us to choose what is the most convenient choice for us. Next time when I say my marriage vow, "...in good times and in bad...", it is a vow to enter a marriage that is not portrayed by most of the Hollywood movies.
I have seen a mother with her teenager who has Down Syndrome. This girl made the most beautiful genuflection in front of Our Lord (I would say better than many adults). Her parents believed that their children, both the typically developing and the one with developmental delays, could grow in virtues too.
When I was waiting for my friends outside a shop in Rome, I managed to have a short conversation with a Japanese lady and her teenager-daughter who has a Down Syndrome. I was a bit 'tempted' to talk in motherese (there's a tendency to treat them as children). However, I was reminded that even if their mental age is lower than their chronological age, at that stage, she was not supposed to be treated like a child. So I asked a few questions just like how I normally talk to the teenagers. I observed how the mother talked to her in Japanese, and I was just amazed on how refine this young lady was!
I also witnessed a young couple defending the life of their first-born baby who 'just' lived for three months. I don't think I can forget how courageous they are and how supportive their friends are from Legion of Mary. For some people, perhaps this is a 'waste-money-decision'. However, for a lot of us, this young couple has become a real example how it is very possible to be heroic to say no even though other people may say "it's better to abort the baby".
To be honest, I felt sad. And a bit scared... I've seen more and more friends are confused despite the fact that we go to Church every Sunday (again...it's not sufficient to just go to Church).
So I pray that I can journey more with my friends. I pray that we can talk more about these issues about life, because life is not a small matter. I pray that we can be strong support for each other if any of us needs to make difficult, but a right decision, just like how I've seen some other mothers supported each other.
