Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Forever pressure cooker

Sometimes I feel that the things that have been going on around me and people around me this year are a forever-pressure-cooker. At some points of time, I feel like just screaming to God, "can you give me a break?'' Oh well...perhaps there were breaks, happy moments and so-called peaceful moments without any pressure, but there are times like now which made me feel that the environmental factors around me and my significant other were just constant triggers of stress. When I look forward, what I see is also only another trigger of stress.

After his PhD thesis, there is conference. After conference there is another waiting period of job hunting, and from my side, I am adjusting to my pay-cut from the previous job. I've never felt this motivated to take note of every single cent spent from my salary.

Of course of course there are many positive things and so-called roses, but even though I am not in a research job anymore, the stress of my previous boss now kinda shadowed me. That's' the life of academia no? First, stress to finish your degree. Second, job hunting is not easy. Third, even if you get an academia job, the high pressure of publishing in peer-reviewed journal. I remember those days when my colleague ran one after another statistical analysis, and wrote one after another draft of manuscript. And those days when my previous boss replied emails at 2 or 4am, yet she was still very energetic during work time!

Oh well, the good thing (aha! I see the roses now), at least I've been there before. I don't feel so stupid and clueless about my boyfriend's job and stress. Nevertheless, accepting that this is part of my life too and seriously being cool about it in high-stress moments sometimes do not happen together. I just need to pray and remind myself that 'things get better over time' despite a constant knocking on head ''haha..this will happen at least for the next 5-7 years'' (the most stressful period is when people do postdoc and when they are still assistant professors).

Anyway, tomorrow my preschool has national day celebration! Yeay! Hoping for a good weather.

Bottled sunshine needs a little bit of sunshine. It's been rainy two days ago and yesterday. Instead of singing 'How is the weather today?', our class sang 'rain rain go away' :p  Oh the topic of last week's formation class was on cheerfulness! Luckily! =D

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