When I say "single" in this post, it means "not married", whether an individual is attached or not.
I've read an awesome post on the Catholic Young Women about the beautiful period called singlehood: on friendship that we form in this period of time. Unfortunately, I can't remember the title of the post. Anyway, let's talk about being single.
Some people look at being single as 'happy-go-lucky', but this term has a negative connotation. I would say that as single people, we're happy people =D (when we're married or not later on, depending on our vocation, we're still happy too, as long as that what God wants for us). 'happy-go-lucky' is usually defined as..hmmm, let me think. Do you whatever you want to do? Go wherever you want to go?
(Un)fortunately, this period is also a period in which we have a HUGE responsibility, just like the married life. During a formation session, a lady told me and Krizia, that apostolate is like another child for us. Since we still do not have children yet, we need to do LOTS of apostolate now, at this moment, as single ladies. It doesn't mean that when we're married, we don't do apostolate anymore, but the form of the apostolate will change. When we are married, the main apostolate is our family. However now, is a time to reach out to many people and nurture special friendships when we are generally more 'available'.
I (used to) like to complain (I used 'brackets' because I do still complain) about Paul's or my packed schedule. The thing is..we still can make time for each other, so there's no reason to complain =P However, I (used to) often complain:
1. My Saturdays are gone!!
2. Why can't we be like other couples?? Just go watch movie, no need to think about a, b, c.
(We watch fewer than four movies per year)
My Saturdays used to be very 'sacred'. You can cancel meeting me on other days, but NOT on Saturday evenings. I'll be super-grumpy and I'll say nasty things. (oh yeah...public holiday too!!)
It used to be easy. I used to have options: meet Friday + Saturday + Sunday or either two. Now we meet Friday / Saturday / Sunday --> choose one.
The good news is..I'm happy. We are happier. Not because we desperately want to get rid of each other or have our own personal time more, but because making time for other friends makes me focus on other people. Fr Mario is right. One way to kill the pride is firstly, pray and sacrifice more for other people. It's not that I don't struggle anymore, I do still feel upset when I'm tired, when I feel that it's so difficult to have my own time (or dating time!), when there is... change of plan (this one is still a HUGE stumbling block for me), and I can just break down and cry because of silly things. However, I thank God that He let me see how beautiful this period of living as a single lady (I wanted to write "girl", but *cough* not a girl anymore). This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment too. When I can spend time with my girl friends chatting and consoling each other, talking about our hopes and dreams, when I can spend afternoons with the cheerful (= noisy) little girls, when I can just have a quick dinner with my close friend before heading home, this is not what the world calls 'happy-go-lucky'. We are married for a mission, we are (still) single also for a mission :)
So yeah...how have you taken care of your "children"? :)
I've read an awesome post on the Catholic Young Women about the beautiful period called singlehood: on friendship that we form in this period of time. Unfortunately, I can't remember the title of the post. Anyway, let's talk about being single.
Some people look at being single as 'happy-go-lucky', but this term has a negative connotation. I would say that as single people, we're happy people =D (when we're married or not later on, depending on our vocation, we're still happy too, as long as that what God wants for us). 'happy-go-lucky' is usually defined as..hmmm, let me think. Do you whatever you want to do? Go wherever you want to go?
(Un)fortunately, this period is also a period in which we have a HUGE responsibility, just like the married life. During a formation session, a lady told me and Krizia, that apostolate is like another child for us. Since we still do not have children yet, we need to do LOTS of apostolate now, at this moment, as single ladies. It doesn't mean that when we're married, we don't do apostolate anymore, but the form of the apostolate will change. When we are married, the main apostolate is our family. However now, is a time to reach out to many people and nurture special friendships when we are generally more 'available'.
I (used to) like to complain (I used 'brackets' because I do still complain) about Paul's or my packed schedule. The thing is..we still can make time for each other, so there's no reason to complain =P However, I (used to) often complain:
1. My Saturdays are gone!!
2. Why can't we be like other couples?? Just go watch movie, no need to think about a, b, c.
(We watch fewer than four movies per year)
My Saturdays used to be very 'sacred'. You can cancel meeting me on other days, but NOT on Saturday evenings. I'll be super-grumpy and I'll say nasty things. (oh yeah...public holiday too!!)
It used to be easy. I used to have options: meet Friday + Saturday + Sunday or either two. Now we meet Friday / Saturday / Sunday --> choose one.
The good news is..I'm happy. We are happier. Not because we desperately want to get rid of each other or have our own personal time more, but because making time for other friends makes me focus on other people. Fr Mario is right. One way to kill the pride is firstly, pray and sacrifice more for other people. It's not that I don't struggle anymore, I do still feel upset when I'm tired, when I feel that it's so difficult to have my own time (or dating time!), when there is... change of plan (this one is still a HUGE stumbling block for me), and I can just break down and cry because of silly things. However, I thank God that He let me see how beautiful this period of living as a single lady (I wanted to write "girl", but *cough* not a girl anymore). This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment too. When I can spend time with my girl friends chatting and consoling each other, talking about our hopes and dreams, when I can spend afternoons with the cheerful (= noisy) little girls, when I can just have a quick dinner with my close friend before heading home, this is not what the world calls 'happy-go-lucky'. We are married for a mission, we are (still) single also for a mission :)
So yeah...how have you taken care of your "children"? :)
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