I used to write, write, and write posts without spending too much time reading other people's blogs. I can't remember when I started picking up this "blogwalking" hobby, but I guess this hobby is spread by Nic.
Why do I read others' blogs?
Well, I truly found inspiration from other people's blogs. This is real life of the people with real challenges. The fact that they 'survive' inspires me and reminds me that even if I feel some things are impossible, to read other people's life stories reminds me that I'm not alone in pursuing this "ideal".
I have posted similar posts in my Indonesian blog, but today as I "walked" through my favorite blogs, I want to share some thoughts again about what I learn from other people's blogs. My first encounter with Catholic mother's blog started from here. I think Dom posted this blog on his facebook and in that blog, I've found this post on stay-at-home-mother. Then, on one Sunday afternoon after my cooking session with Sharmini, she told me about this post on Natural Family Planning and openness to life. Believe it or not, as a young girl (I believe that I'm young :P), after I (try to) understand more about the importance of being open to life in marriage, I was kind of curious, "So...do couples who "need" to postpone pregnancy abstain from sex on their wedding night if it's in the woman's fertile period??
At the end of the day, these posts are sharing from other people. Yes, we must be cautious when we read other people's stories. Each person's situation is different. Nevertheless, one important lesson that I learn from these blogs are the reminder that these people live in the US, with the secularism, with the increasingly anti-family culture, with a high living cost, etc etc. YET, these people are blessed, these people are happy, and these people struggle to be faithful (notice that their blogs tell you about their hardships too!) ! This is such a beautiful reminder for me.
Why? Because as I grow up (a biiiittt) more, I notice that it's difficult to put your ideals into practice. Look at how Singaporeans (and me, a foreigner in Singapore) complain about the high living cost in Singapore (especially, HOUSING!!!). It's expensive to live here until people think that it's "normal" to choose not to have kids, it's "normal" to not get married, it's "normal" to think 'die die must have house first before getting married', it's "normal" to think that your kid must go to the BEST kindergarten ever. Nevertheless, the wonderful people around me did NOT experience the so-called best kindergarten! My colleague, graduated from Ph.D. in Edinburgh, did not even attend a kindergarten. My boyfriend, 'only' attended a normal government kindergarten half-day. Sharmini was also taught by her mom at home when she was toddler! I was initially against the idea of homeschooling kids. Come on, in Singapore?? How can it be possible? I was against this idea because at least I attended half-day kindergarten in Indonesia. Nevertheless, after seeing these people, after reading blogs of people who live in similar "challenging environment", well, I guess it's good to keep this in mind. The wonderful people around me did not have a house immediately after they get married.
Ideally you have your own house, you have your career established, you have your money to send kids to best kindergarten, but these blogs told me that it's perfectly OKAY not to have this ideal situation. I can't also stop looking back at my parents, my friends' parents, etc. Not surprisingly, they do not live in the so-called "ideal" situation. The normal thing back then is... to learn how to live with your in-law, to slowly build a home, a family! And I think my dad's first car only came when I was around 8 years old.
Going back to blogwalking, no one knows what will happen to me in the near or long future. Perhaps one day I look back and read my post and think that "You... crazy naive (young) girl." Well, I guess I've always been the same crazy girl. As much as I dream to study in Oxford (hoeeek, vomit :P), as much as I want to be a behavioural therapist, as much as I want to open my own clinic, as much as I want to travel here and there,
I would love to have my own family.
I remember one conversation with my Thai painting friends in my third year. We are eating at the pier opposite Wat Arun (Bangkok) then I told them, "Wahh, I love travelling! I want to go here, go there. Maybe it's fun ya to be a travel guide?
One of them: "Ya ya! Same here!"
Me: But this kind of job, hmm, a bit hard when you have kids ya. At the end of the day, you want to settle down right?
Same person: Umm, I just want to explore the world. A bit weird to think about settling down.
>.<
Perhaps this pull-and-push factor between MY ambition and my other deep 'ambition' is something that makes me really interested to pray more for my colleague, whose situation is not easy. I hope things will work out for her!!in
Once I told my spiritual director and directress, I felt a burden! Why oh why other people at my age could still 'enjoy life'? Nevertheless, I quickly hit myself every time I feel a burden in attending my spiritual formation, or going for Masses, or etc. I quickly told the Lord, "Oh please.. I don't want to trade my vocation and You, Lord, with other things." Citing Paul, "Things can be a burden, but a sweet burden" (Chen, 2013). :P
Why do I read others' blogs?
Well, I truly found inspiration from other people's blogs. This is real life of the people with real challenges. The fact that they 'survive' inspires me and reminds me that even if I feel some things are impossible, to read other people's life stories reminds me that I'm not alone in pursuing this "ideal".
I have posted similar posts in my Indonesian blog, but today as I "walked" through my favorite blogs, I want to share some thoughts again about what I learn from other people's blogs. My first encounter with Catholic mother's blog started from here. I think Dom posted this blog on his facebook and in that blog, I've found this post on stay-at-home-mother. Then, on one Sunday afternoon after my cooking session with Sharmini, she told me about this post on Natural Family Planning and openness to life. Believe it or not, as a young girl (I believe that I'm young :P), after I (try to) understand more about the importance of being open to life in marriage, I was kind of curious, "So...do couples who "need" to postpone pregnancy abstain from sex on their wedding night if it's in the woman's fertile period??
At the end of the day, these posts are sharing from other people. Yes, we must be cautious when we read other people's stories. Each person's situation is different. Nevertheless, one important lesson that I learn from these blogs are the reminder that these people live in the US, with the secularism, with the increasingly anti-family culture, with a high living cost, etc etc. YET, these people are blessed, these people are happy, and these people struggle to be faithful (notice that their blogs tell you about their hardships too!) ! This is such a beautiful reminder for me.
Why? Because as I grow up (a biiiittt) more, I notice that it's difficult to put your ideals into practice. Look at how Singaporeans (and me, a foreigner in Singapore) complain about the high living cost in Singapore (especially, HOUSING!!!). It's expensive to live here until people think that it's "normal" to choose not to have kids, it's "normal" to not get married, it's "normal" to think 'die die must have house first before getting married', it's "normal" to think that your kid must go to the BEST kindergarten ever. Nevertheless, the wonderful people around me did NOT experience the so-called best kindergarten! My colleague, graduated from Ph.D. in Edinburgh, did not even attend a kindergarten. My boyfriend, 'only' attended a normal government kindergarten half-day. Sharmini was also taught by her mom at home when she was toddler! I was initially against the idea of homeschooling kids. Come on, in Singapore?? How can it be possible? I was against this idea because at least I attended half-day kindergarten in Indonesia. Nevertheless, after seeing these people, after reading blogs of people who live in similar "challenging environment", well, I guess it's good to keep this in mind. The wonderful people around me did not have a house immediately after they get married.
Ideally you have your own house, you have your career established, you have your money to send kids to best kindergarten, but these blogs told me that it's perfectly OKAY not to have this ideal situation. I can't also stop looking back at my parents, my friends' parents, etc. Not surprisingly, they do not live in the so-called "ideal" situation. The normal thing back then is... to learn how to live with your in-law, to slowly build a home, a family! And I think my dad's first car only came when I was around 8 years old.
Going back to blogwalking, no one knows what will happen to me in the near or long future. Perhaps one day I look back and read my post and think that "You... crazy naive (young) girl." Well, I guess I've always been the same crazy girl. As much as I dream to study in Oxford (hoeeek, vomit :P), as much as I want to be a behavioural therapist, as much as I want to open my own clinic, as much as I want to travel here and there,
I would love to have my own family.
I remember one conversation with my Thai painting friends in my third year. We are eating at the pier opposite Wat Arun (Bangkok) then I told them, "Wahh, I love travelling! I want to go here, go there. Maybe it's fun ya to be a travel guide?
One of them: "Ya ya! Same here!"
Me: But this kind of job, hmm, a bit hard when you have kids ya. At the end of the day, you want to settle down right?
Same person: Umm, I just want to explore the world. A bit weird to think about settling down.
>.<
Perhaps this pull-and-push factor between MY ambition and my other deep 'ambition' is something that makes me really interested to pray more for my colleague, whose situation is not easy. I hope things will work out for her!!in
Once I told my spiritual director and directress, I felt a burden! Why oh why other people at my age could still 'enjoy life'? Nevertheless, I quickly hit myself every time I feel a burden in attending my spiritual formation, or going for Masses, or etc. I quickly told the Lord, "Oh please.. I don't want to trade my vocation and You, Lord, with other things." Citing Paul, "Things can be a burden, but a sweet burden" (Chen, 2013). :P
24th May, please come quickly! Can't wait to see you!
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