I would like to write this post as a reminder for me and for other people who sometimes feel the pinch of the so-called 'sacrifice'.
=)
As my spiritual director says, it is normal to feel the pinch, but don't look back.
I think this is very important. I remember that two years ago, when I said 'yes' to date my current boyfriend, I know my world will be upside down (I thought it is only something that people say in movie or in wedding speech to make things sound sweet, but apparently it's not). My world is literally upside down now, in a positive way.
There was one night, early in our relationship, I was skyping with my boyfriend because he returned to Singapore after a short visit to Indonesia. I was thinking very hard after short and long conversation with my mom, and somehow I reached a conclusion to tell him this one line, "I would like to let go of my dream for you."
It's not easy to say, and it's even harder to do in small moment and big moment.
Fast forward, it's almost been two years of our courtship. Now I really see and feel what that one line means and its impact on me and on both of us.
So when action is required, it's not easy, but it is worthwhile. Yes, it is worthwhile.
I am fully aware of the choice that I have made and the choice that I will make.
So here comes the role of prayer and sacraments, and also spiritual direction. No one, no one can survive without these things. Temptation to look back is there, but how much we want to entertain the temptation is another story. I also believe that eventually God will grant us more graces to be wise in the choices that we'll make, but I need to ask for this grace. I need to tell Our Lord, "Hey, you want me to do this right? But I'm weak, please help me."
When action is required, as a priest told me yesterday, "Ask God to sign the 'contract' " If it's His will, ask Him to 'sign' and things will turn out alright. :)
=)
As my spiritual director says, it is normal to feel the pinch, but don't look back.
I think this is very important. I remember that two years ago, when I said 'yes' to date my current boyfriend, I know my world will be upside down (I thought it is only something that people say in movie or in wedding speech to make things sound sweet, but apparently it's not). My world is literally upside down now, in a positive way.
There was one night, early in our relationship, I was skyping with my boyfriend because he returned to Singapore after a short visit to Indonesia. I was thinking very hard after short and long conversation with my mom, and somehow I reached a conclusion to tell him this one line, "I would like to let go of my dream for you."
It's not easy to say, and it's even harder to do in small moment and big moment.
Fast forward, it's almost been two years of our courtship. Now I really see and feel what that one line means and its impact on me and on both of us.
So when action is required, it's not easy, but it is worthwhile. Yes, it is worthwhile.
I am fully aware of the choice that I have made and the choice that I will make.
So here comes the role of prayer and sacraments, and also spiritual direction. No one, no one can survive without these things. Temptation to look back is there, but how much we want to entertain the temptation is another story. I also believe that eventually God will grant us more graces to be wise in the choices that we'll make, but I need to ask for this grace. I need to tell Our Lord, "Hey, you want me to do this right? But I'm weak, please help me."
When action is required, as a priest told me yesterday, "Ask God to sign the 'contract' " If it's His will, ask Him to 'sign' and things will turn out alright. :)
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