Interesting knowledge about animal's collective behavior

Recently someone shared with me about a talk that he attended on animal's collective behavior. Have you ever seen a large number of fish swimming to the same direction? Yeah, something like that.

Yesterday when the BBC channel was on while I didn't pay attention to the TV, I saw this scene of a large number of fish swimming to the same direction. I  'screamed', "hey is that the guy (the researcher) that gave the talk in the conference that you attended?" and...aha! The same guy!

This paper told us the importance on how both information and social cohesion play an important role in the collective-decision making in animals. Interestingly, this often happens in our society too. We assume that most people know about the direction of the 'leader' is. However, this may not be the case. A few strong 'leader' are sufficient to direct a group with individuals that do not have sufficient information. Therefore, it is very important to have the knowledge and to educate each individual.

Last Saturday, the topic of the talk in the recollection that I attended was on 'formation'. Unlike 'information', formation is beyond theories. It is something that we learn yet it should transform our lives. (eg. it's not only about 'knowing' that french fries is unhealthy, but to be 'formed' is to decide to eat french fries less frequently because you know how unhealthy). In spiritual life, it's not enough to say 'the Bible says so'. The faith is beautiful and rich, and knowing more about the faith influences how we behave in our daily life, including in our profession and family life. Sadly, what's happening in the spiritual life of many individuals now is an 'uninformed' state that makes us easily swayed to the wrong direction by certain groups of people, towards certain groups' agenda that may not be for the good of the society.

Well, this post may not be detailed enough to talk about this topic of collective behavior. Do read up the full paper to find out more. Some other pyschology researchers have investigated this issue collective behavior in humans.

What I'd like to highlight is there is a real danger of being ignorant. In a positive way to say it, there is a high importance to inform ourselves and help others to learn more about the truth, so we can bring the society to the right direction, to a direction that is more humane =)

Have a great week ahead!

Ethical issues in giving comments or posting

My mom used to say, "Some people talk like farting. Just throwing what they feel and ignoring the leftover smell".

The increasing use of social media made it very easy to just post things that we like or hate, and share a piece of news (be it news or opinions, true or not), and giving comments (be it charitable or not).

I'm still learning how to giving comment on facebook. I've experience in replying people (including strangers) not in a charitable manner, and now I've also experienced how annoying it is when you can tell how other people commenting on your post 'without thinking', like farting.

The moral of the story:
Don't say what you won't say face-to-face.
Don't reply a comment in a joking manner if the 'stranger' at the opposite side does not even know you and may take your joke seriously.
And lastly, ah...avoid debate on wall page. 

For us who like to share pieces of 'news', please verify the sources before we share and make the 'news' viral.

Counting down for birthday!! (not so soon, but I'm in contemplative mood already)

Perhaps it is true that as one gets older, birthday feels more 'normal'. It's just one of the other days.

However, I still refuse to be 'normal' on my birthday. hahaha. I think birthday is a good opportunity to review my new year's resolutions, to revise my resolutions if necessary, and to remember and put them into actions if I have not done so.

For me, being 24 gives me a different feeling. I guess because this is a gentle reminder for me that I'm officially not-a-college-girl anymore. Hahaha. It's easy to remember this age because among my close friends and me, our mothers were married or expecting 'us' when they were 24. So there's a cultural expectation that we need to seriously grow up and stop thinking about ourselves. Even though my close friends and I are not married yet, we know that we are not happy-go-lucky-girl anymore (if it means that one just needs to think of herself). We are happy, but part of our happiness is a continuous awareness that we need to learn to be a better people, to serve our parents, families, & friends in a better way, and to be wiser. ^^

It's easy to say, but it's hard to do it.

However, that's precisely the reason for me writing this thought on my blog. This is something important for me and my friends. In case any of us forgets how important it is to grow up and to be less selfish, I can read this post again and remind myself.

=)

Pause

Taking a pause or a 'brake' or a 'break' can be a challenge for me. Let me rephrase it. It is a challenge. I don't know why, I have this idea that I need to go out on weekends. When I'm 'stuck' in my house, I feel restless. I end up continue doing housework or browsing unnecessary thing (i.e., facebook) and I just can't sit down and read or write diary or even just continue to do my crochê. 

My current spiritual reading book is this wonderful book:

Let me share with you something that struck me in this book:

"Life has become continuous activity. Many people suffer from stress or chronic fatigue. Professional demands create excessive obligations, and even the demands of the entertainment industry have become burdensome. All people want to do in the evening is rest, find distraction from everyday problems, and avoid effort. The result is a certain 'spiritual alienation', visible in the superficiality of one who lives only for the here and now. In our jaded consumer society, we find it difficult to stop and take a deeper look at our surroundings and ourselves." (p.19)

A priest once told me that to sleep early can be a mortification for me. It's something hard to do, but it can bring me good thing. Being silent at night, switching off my internet network is an important thing for my soul because my soul needs time to talk to God, I need to talk to God right before I fall asleep, and this silent moment will help me to prepare for the next day better.

So this is something that I need to learn. 

To Pause.

If you are wondering what's the relationship between 'pause' and 'freedom', I strongly recommend you to read the book =) It's very beautiful because the book constantly emphasizes that freedom is part of our nature. Without the ability to be alone with ourselves, we can't be free, because we don't want to be friends for ourselves. (p.20). 

Let's make it a challenge for this week. 
1) to sleep early
2) not to reply message immediately
3) to resume my writing diary habit
4) to set aside time to sit down and pray and prepare for Mass better
5) to pause and plan my day every morning.

7 Quick Takes Friday - vol.42

- 1 -

Hi, it's been a while! I've been 'busy resting' for the past weeks. I mean, I tried not to switch on my laptop when I'm about to sleep (e.g., like now...).

I finally finished reading Sense and Sensibility (thanks to my  broken phone, the only way to spend my time in the bus and train is reading). I am also 3/4 finishing this book:

It's very good! It may seem that I don't get angry a lot, but anger does affect me and it feels so good to slowly understand my feeling and learn to handle it.

- 2 -

Two weeks ago I watched "The Way" (2012) as part of the bonding session for our trip this September.

Now our 5-day-walk for the Camino feels so short. Hahaha.

- 3 -

Last Monday I went to play with my boyfriend's niece. She's already three years old and she loves scooter. But...she wants us to push her so she just needs to stand on her scooter @.@ hahaha..

- 4 -

After I watched that movie, I really think I should have a 'one-line-answer' if people ask me why I do the Camino. I have lots of personal prayer intentions and thanksgiving. My friends said we can do lots of rosaries on the way (because it's around 20 km per day).

- 5 -

A good blog that was recommended by my boyfriend. I often think that elegance is not for everyone. However, slowly I learn to see it as something good and something that can be personalized according to my personality too. The most important lesson that I learned from this blog is: do not rush! I can feel even when I am writing now, I always rush. I think it's time to start writing diary again, to learn to slow down and pause.

- 6 -

Long distance relationship, even for 2 weeks, is quite challenging. I think the worst part is the 12-hour-difference when both sides are working. However, I think the problem is not the LDR itself, but the expectation. If I already expect that communication will be less frequent, I don't think there is a problem. However, if I thought I would be able to Skype quite often but it didn't turn out to be like that, I became super-angsty about it. Another important lesson from LDR is I learn to appreciate the other side more because now I realize how precious is a mere presence of the other side.

- 7 -

 Talking about reading books on relationships, my friend gave me a good suggestion: to highlight important parts of the books with different color (e.g., I highlight in yellow, while my boyfriend highlight what's important for him in blue). I haven't done that because I don't have the courage to highlight my book (I feel like it's a pity for the book to be highlighted!!). However, my boyfriend doesn't mind, so I think we should give it a try. Hopefully I will use more common sense after I read this book when the times come for discussion / disagreement again. My favorite part of the book above is the chapter on "Crafting an apology". Even though I know my boyfriend's 'apology language', most of the time my pride overrides my common sense and I end up just finding excuses for myself. I just choose a language or a way of apology (if it can even be categorized as an apology) that still makes me 'comfortable'. Yeah..lots of things to work on!

More quick takes at Jen's blog!!

7 Quick Takes Friday - vol. 41

- 1-

I would like to share a beautiful video that my boyfriend shared with me:

http://vimeo.com/93079367

I actually have saved a draft post on this discussion on homosexuality. However, I'm not sure if it's a right time to write it now. The situation is getting hotter here in Singapore. There is so much misunderstanding and it's so easy to pick up a line and attack the Church. Please pray for us and for the Archbishop. However, I think the worst situation to have fellow Catholic friends write on facebook on their 'position' against the Archbishop's message. Sigh.

When I attended a friend's wedding yesterday, my first thought was, "God, please protect them and other families here in Singapore." When I recall the children I knew that are adopted children of some friends, I imagine what if these same children were deprived from their rights to have a mother and a father. Despite all the attacks and dispute, why nobody talks about children? (other than making things equivalent between childless couple and homosexual parents; which is not right) Why nobody relates what they read about motherhood and fatherhood and bring it to discussion? Why people just scream freedom freedom freedom without knowing what it means?

I appreciate this video a lot because it's a lesson for all individuals, heterosexual or with same-sex attraction. It's a great lesson about chastity. However, above all, it's a huge lesson on happiness.

What makes us happy?

These individuals have the courage to tell the world what truly makes them happy is not what other people assume!

- 2 -

I would also like to share about what this article that I found through little catholic bubble blog.

- 3 -

 Talking about homosexuality issue can't be separated from the discussion about marriage and sex in general. However, recently I've been having difficulties to balance between the data on Natural Family Planning (NFP) and the explanation of something beyond the 'success or failure' of NFP, about the spirit of openness to life. Furthermore, all the data that I have are US-based. How to talk about NFP issue to my friends in Indonesia in which poverty and medical problem is a real problem for the majority? (not for a small group number of people). How to talk about NFP to doctors that already have prejudice of the failure of NFP and not yet understand the bigger picture of marriage and misunderstood the words 'procreation'? I understand how to talk to non-Catholics about openness to life, but to talk to a Catholic who has a strong opinion against NFP? Wow, this is something new for me.

My boyfriend is right. If someone truly wants to find the truth, there are chunks of information out there that provide answers, and I may not be the best person to explain some things. However, I feel that it's part of my responsibility too. If you can provide me with references on NFP that are comprehensive (not just those with 'percentage of success'; but detailed with sampling method etc, and even better if it's based not only in US), I would really appreciate it. Thank you!

- 4 -

new flower arrangment last week:
(same flower, different angle and lighting)

- 5 -

I finally met my friends who went for NOC India in 2011 (NUS Overseas College; an entrepreneurial program that gives opportunity to intern in India). It is very heartwarming to catch up with these friends and recalled funny things that happened during internship, such as frequent lights out in our guest house where we stayed. hehehe

- 6 -

Today is Indonesian election. Please pray for my country =)

- 7 -

Recently I've been thinking a lot about the notion of freedom and happiness. I'm very grateful that I have a chance to meet happy people who also have a lot of adversities. This experience will be a good reminder for me when one day I'm faced with bigger or heavier crosses and also a good reminder for me to carry my small crosses now with a joy.

More quick takes at Jen's blog!

You don't always get what you want

Seriously...you don't always get you want.

Even though you have holy intentions, fabulous plans, you don't always get what you want.

If you think that freedom means you must always be able to do and to get what you want, I think you'll be very depressed.

There will be times when it's very hard to accept God's will. The more I see the various types of crosses that people around me carry, the more I am reminded that it's sooo normal to not get what you want.


At one point of time, I think...it's actually very beautiful to say that I want to let go what I want. =) It's hard, but it's beautiful. Unfortunately, not many people can see this beauty.